Monstrous Lies
It all happened quite innocently one night, over a few curries and a few lagers, when some people from work and i mentioned that we have a coffee machine in our unit. It's great, it grinds the beans, self-steams and percolates, and makes the coffee which fuels the scientific research for the day. Our fellow dining companion, who works in the same department, but in a more administrative role was so impressed. "You have a free coffee machine?!" she said with wide eyes. And I couldn't help myself. A little mischievous voice from deep inside spoke up and said "Yeah, it's right next to the chocolate machine" !!! I then proceeded to explain about the free chocolate machine, and she was taken in hook, line and sinker. "Of course you can't get every kind of chocolate, it's got a limited selection. But you can get the basics, like kit kats, oh and malteasers" This statement was met with approval and much nodding of heads. "And it's not *free*, like not just anyone can walk up and use it, you have to punch your grant code into the keypad to activate it, like a passcode for the photocopier, but our boss doesn't mind." My audience of one then asked if she could come up for coffee on Thursday and I just couldn't keep it together. My straight face lost the battle to the internal giggling fit and I was out-ed as the teller of huge massive fibbs !!One taste of the power of falsehood and I was addicted. I've now come up with a series of new and improved tall tales to tell, the biggest and best of which is Neighbours Duty.
You know, Neighbours duty... it's like jury duty, but you're called up to be an extra on Neighbours. I only found out about it when I moved to Melbourne, because then I was on the Victorian state electoral roll, and that's where they film Neighbours you see.. I mean it wouldn't make sense if you lived in Sydney or Queensland to have to come down for it. It's usually only a few days, and you don't always get picked, sometimes you turn up and they don't need that many people, or they only want tall blokes or something. You don't get to pick which episode you're on, but sometimes you can get lucky. Like one of my friends got to be a fireman in the scene when Harold's coffee shop burnt down.. that was pretty cool. He even got a line, and so his name was in the credits. And that's how some people actually get their start in TV, by meeting people and making contacts. Of course i'm not really that interested, and you can get out of it if you have a job that's essential, or if you are a full-time carer or you're sick or something. But most people do do it, cause it'd be un-Australian not to... yeah, it's kinda cool!
How far I get through that one without laughing depends on the crowd, and how far down the bottle of wine we are.. but it's good to set yourself challenges! *giggle*
posted by Dr Krystal @ 12:27 pm
2 Comments:
Being an Australian, you will have to try the classic drop bears and hoop snakes stories. Though I think these work better on Americans than Brits.
Matt likes to tell OS people that he's a koala sticker - he uses a stick to get koalas off the Harbour Bridge! Unfortunately, he starts out against a tide of disbelief, and has to sway them with his stright face (and they buy it in about 2 minutes, because everyone knows the REST of Australia is FULL of kangaroos and stuff, so why not Sydney after all?), so it's not something I could ever pull off.
I love Neighbours Duty though!
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